THE MISSION

Welcome Mothers, Fathers, Grandmothers, Grandfathers, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, Friends and anyone else who needs an ear...Please come with an open heart.

This is a place for anyone who has felt the loss of a child. Treat this as a communication haven regardless of how or when you felt your loss. My definition of loss: miscarriage at any stage, still birth regardless of week gestation, infant death at any month, and loss of a child even if your child was all grown up. For me they all hold the same root of devestation. None are more profound or more "easily" dealt with than another.

Please cry if you need to.
Please connect with others who are in your same space.
Please email me if you feel led to
Please comment so we know what you need
Please tell your story

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Happy Birthday Emma Grace

There is a plan for today wrapped in the kind of traditions we created to measure unquantifiable things.

We will measure her burning bush. How tall would you be.
We will take pictures of her grave with a newly potted mum. What would your new look be?
We will eat a strawberry drip cake with vanilla pudding frosting. What would your favorite flavor be?

Most of the time I have made peace with these answerless questions. In fact, most of the time I just make it up in my head, creating a satisfactory picture much like a sketch artist in a police station. But yesterday my living children, her sisters, posed the questions in such a way that my bland answers of third grade kind of tall just didn't seem to cut it.

"I know" Bear said, "She be just about as tall as the Maddie in third grade, you know, the skinny one and she'd have long straight dark brown hair kind of like me, but longer and her favorite flavor of cake is definately strawberry cause daddy's the only one who really likes it and he needs someone on his side."

So, there you have it. A picture of Emma I've never seen sketched with words by her little sister.

After crying myself to sleep last night I woke to messages from around the globe filled with loving words, supporting advice, and reminders that I'm not in this alone - that the supporter needs to allow herself to be supported every now and then.

I'll take that with me to work today. I can do this. I have to do this.

19 comments:

Michelle said...

Happy birthday sweet angel!

Thinking of you. ((HUGS))

Sara said...

Birthday hugs

LuckyOnce said...

Thinking of you on this very special day of remembrance...

Martha said...

Happy Birthday, Sweet Emma Grace.
Love Always and in all ways to her family who love, miss, and cherish her.

Salma said...

Thinking of you and wishing you all the best. Thank you for reaching out to me.

Bluebird said...

Happy birthday sweet Emma. You are so, so loved.

Thinking of you today Cara. Remembering with you. How I wish your eldest was here with you.

And what a beautiful sketch sweet Bear drew of her. You should be so proud of how you raised your girls to know their sister.

((Hugs))

Kristin said...

Happy Birthday Emma Grace. You will never be forgotten.

Dora said...

Happy birthday Emma Grace. You are so loved.

So are you, Cara. I hope you feel us with you all day today. Big hug!

k@lakly said...

Thinking of you you and Emma Grace and all that should have been.
xxoo

The Blue Sparrow said...

Wishing your perfect Emma Grace a Happy Birthday today!

Brenna said...

Holding you especially close today, Cara. Happy Birthday to your beautiful girl, Emma Grace.

Barbara said...

Remembering Emma Grace with a smile in my little corner of the world.

I think your Bear is a very wise young lady.

xxx

Aunt Becky said...

Happy Birthday, baby girl. How I wish you were here.

CLC said...

Happy Birthday Emma Grace! I wish you were here to blow out your candles.

Lani said...

thinking of you cara- i've missed you! happy birthday emma grace. sending love xo

Another Dreamer said...

(*hugs*)Happy Birthday sweet Emma Grace.

Amy said...

Happy Birthday, Emma! My heart is with you all.

Once A Mother said...

Oh she would be all those things and more. What a beautiful way for her sister to imagines her!
Missing your sweet Emma Grace with you.
Hugs

MrsSpock said...

My apologies for being so late in saying Happy Birthday Emma- who will always be missed.

Lost Found Connections Abound! It Works - So Let's Use It!

Submit My News Click here to submit my news to the LFCA

CATCH UP FROM THE START!

TO READ MY STORY FROM THE BEGINNING CLICK HERE THEN READ THE 7 COUNTDOWN POSTS TO EMMA'S EIGHTH BIRTHDAY!


Time Is Both My Best Ally and My Worst Enemy: My Meltdown 8 Years Later