Welcome Mothers, Fathers, Grandmothers, Grandfathers, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, Friends and anyone else who needs an ear...Please come with an open heart.

This is a place for anyone who has felt the loss of a child. Treat this as a communication haven regardless of how or when you felt your loss. My definition of loss: miscarriage at any stage, still birth regardless of week gestation, infant death at any month, and loss of a child even if your child was all grown up. For me they all hold the same root of devestation. None are more profound or more "easily" dealt with than another.

Please cry if you need to.
Please connect with others who are in your same space.
Please email me if you feel led to
Please comment so we know what you need
Please tell your story

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

I never did think...

  • I'd connect with a community of loss and infertility parents that understand, accept and affirm my emotions....But I do - and they rock.

  • I'd write for a magazine that makes a difference - that raises awareness about our struggles and losses ...But I do - and I am so very grateful. I love every minute of it.

But -I REALLY never thought I'd get a chance to interview* Elizabeth McCracken. In fact, I thought I got darn lucky to get a galley copy of her memoir, An Exact Replica of a Figment of my Imagination - and it was just that - timing and dumb luck.

Much like a new lover takes solace in the other - I whipped through it the first time in two days, and then took my time the second time around. I dissected her emotions, nodding and crying - yes, yes - that is exactly how I felt. I laughed - oh, how I laughed - I mean, I can't think about the book without cracking a smile in memory of the Dwarfs of Grief and wondering why they weren't employed by my hospital. It would have been a nice reprieve. But most of all I was nearly jumping for joy that a babyloss memoir had finally cracked into the big time, (um - she did have a spot in O-magazine!) and that the general all-pregnancies-end-in-a-live-baby public would finally hear our story.

And then - the suggestion that knocked me for a loop. "Why don't you do the interview?" wrote my fellow Exhale columnist Christina Gombar, "...because you and Elizabeth have experienced the same thing -- loss of a child, followed by healthy birth."

I jumped at the chance, combing the book a third time as I scribbled notes that eventually fleshed out into full-fledged interview questions. Elizabeth was kind and gracious enough to answer all my questions, regardless of her current full time mommy status.

What a treasure of an experience and I think the final interview found: HERE - has a lot to say about life after loss.

Thank you blogosphere. Thank you Exhale (Monica impeticular). And Thank you Elizabeth.

You make this journey more fulfilling each and every day.

Oh - and while you're over there you might as well peruse the other literary and artistic offerings this month's issue has to offer including my current column: Believing Without Seeing.

In Grief and Love - Cara

* - updated to clarify that our communication was through email but her gracious nature came through loud and clear!


Martha said...

Amazing, Cara. I'm privileged to know you and share in your journey.
<3 to your 3 girls

Brenna said...

I absolutely loved the interview! So well done--what a thrill.

Bluebird said...

Great article! And congratulations (is that appropriate to say?!!) on getting the interview! How cool :)

CLC said...

Great interview. I am envious you got to speak to her:)

Dalene said...

Great interview, Cara. I devoured her book and love hearing more from her.

Another Dreamer said...

I rather enjoyed your interview. It was a great article :)

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