Welcome Mothers, Fathers, Grandmothers, Grandfathers, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, Friends and anyone else who needs an ear...Please come with an open heart.

This is a place for anyone who has felt the loss of a child. Treat this as a communication haven regardless of how or when you felt your loss. My definition of loss: miscarriage at any stage, still birth regardless of week gestation, infant death at any month, and loss of a child even if your child was all grown up. For me they all hold the same root of devestation. None are more profound or more "easily" dealt with than another.

Please cry if you need to.
Please connect with others who are in your same space.
Please email me if you feel led to
Please comment so we know what you need
Please tell your story

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

The Place I Should Have Gone

So, every now and then a great idea - no, a hello-stupid-why-didn't-you-think-about-this-sooner idea appears to me (read: hits me over the head).

With the (and pardon the verb use) conception of Share Southern Vermont, Inc. I have been nearly everywhere in the southern Vermont counties distributing promotional materials. I mean, EVERYWHERE!

I have frequented doctor's offices, midwiferies, relaxation specialists, acupuncturists, massages therapists, chiropractors, the hospital (obviously), libraries, day care centers, banks and pretty much ANYWHERE that has a posting board.

I have submitted our news to countless papers - repeatedly. I have learned how to get your info on the local tv station. I have even navigated the semi-complicated world of radio stations.

I thought I had my bases covered. And so, as I cursed having to stop this morning for gas as the bright shining sun is a ruse for the actual weather we are being dealt. (A suto-spring to say the least - highs of 30 with winds at 15-20 mph - and that's a good day!) Anyway, after cursing I set the gas nozzle to automatic and found the best possible place to stand so the wind could access less of my limbs.

And that's when I saw it. (Be ready for the big-fat 'duh' you are about to deal me, and it's going to be even more deserved than the 'where we have our first meeting' story - promise.)
A funeral home was across the street.

Yeah - not kidding. You know, that place where they deal with bereaved people all the time!

Five minutes later: flyers, brochures and business cards complied from the trunk I was sitting in the "talking" room of the funeral home. I had a ten minute conversation with the most astoundingly receptive man I'd ever known to work in such a field. And this is what he said.

"Oh - I wish I had known about you yesterday."

My heart dropped. Another family not aware of what is out there, that we are willing to be their safety net until they get their feet back under them. *sigh* "I might run into them again" he continued, "they are fairly local".

Um, three guesses where I'll be headed tomorrow?? (hint: there are two other funeral homes in adjacent towns)

So - how many 'duh's are you dealing me?


Kathy said...

That does seem to be a perfect place to go to promote your new Share Group! Good for you! When Molly was born and died our local funeral home donated their services to us for free, which meant so much to us. I already knew about our hospital's support group, but that certainly would have been another appropriate way to find out about it.

I so admire the work you are doing to get the Share group going! Way to go! :)

k@lakly said...

So sad and so perfect. I hope you find them or they find you.

Kristin said...

The important thing is that you got the information out there not that you didn't get it out there sooner.

Dalene said...

Don't feel badly--it wouldn't have occurred to me either! Duh! The man from the funeral home that we worked with so kind and treated us with great dignity. They donated all of their services to us, which was really helpful.

Michelle said...

LOL that is kinda funny. But don't feel bad I probably wouldn't have thought of it either.

Jo said...

You are not dumb. . .I think this is an amazing idea. Things always "hit" when the timing is right.

You are making such a difference.

Thank you.


caitsmom said...

I don't know, "duh" doesn't seem right, I vote for "way to go" you got there! I always say, "I may be slow, but at least I GET there." heh heh. ((((hugs))) Good luck with your group. What a wonderful service.


Mrs Woggie said...

Better late than never I say. You may not find that couple, but you will help many many more. You are doing great xox

Stacie said...

Sometimes the so-called logical places are the last ones you think of. The important thing is that you did think of it. Bravo.


MrsSpock said...

And next time, because there will unfortunately be a next time, he will be able to tell them- "There's a woman named Cara..."

Lost Found Connections Abound! It Works - So Let's Use It!

Submit My News Click here to submit my news to the LFCA



Time Is Both My Best Ally and My Worst Enemy: My Meltdown 8 Years Later