Welcome Mothers, Fathers, Grandmothers, Grandfathers, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, Friends and anyone else who needs an ear...Please come with an open heart.

This is a place for anyone who has felt the loss of a child. Treat this as a communication haven regardless of how or when you felt your loss. My definition of loss: miscarriage at any stage, still birth regardless of week gestation, infant death at any month, and loss of a child even if your child was all grown up. For me they all hold the same root of devestation. None are more profound or more "easily" dealt with than another.

Please cry if you need to.
Please connect with others who are in your same space.
Please email me if you feel led to
Please comment so we know what you need
Please tell your story

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Easier Said Than Done

Less screen time, that is. And, I suppose that could mean that I am on the computer more than ever, solidifying my semi-addiction to the ALI world. But this isn't at all what I mean.

Yes. I miss you -- more than you know.

Yes. I run my blog roll in my head while I'm sitting outside a summer camp, on the deck of a swimming pool, or helping the librarian through an activity at the local summer event; musing about your transfers, pregnancies, deliveries, and how the hell Mel does it.

Yes. I miss opening my email and seeing message after message with your words, each seeming to read in my head with a different voice or dialect that obviously I have made up to go with your uber cool personality.

But most of all, I miss writing. It's that simple. I miss that satisfied feeling that settles in the deepest part of my being after I have put my emotions to words and purged them from my body.

And honestly, It matters little to me what I'm writing these days, just that I am. But I made my choice. And it is a good one. The fact that I have little time for creative writing is my doing, and yet I do have deadlines, albeit mini ones, to meet monthly. Yet when the urge strikes I seem rarely to be blessed with the writer's trifecta: mood, inspiration, and time.

In less than two months this blog turns one year old. The day it does will be our first day of school with kids. Yes, that's right, I'm going back to teaching this year - part time, but still it leaves me with a sinking feeling that sounds kinda like how will I ever find any time to write then?

But I will. I'll have to. For the I cannot stand the feeling left behind when I don't.

What a difference a year makes. What a strong presence you are in my lives even if I can't get to your blogs everyday.

Next Post: The beginning of my Journal Series. It's time to open's time.


Hope's Mama said...

All I know is that whenever you write, I'll be here to read. Even if I don't always stop by in the comments to say so.

Bar said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Barbara said...

Oops sorry Cara, blogger had me signed in with another email...

I'll be here too Cara.

And I just know that you'll find the time for everything!


Michelle said...

I'll also be here Cara. I can't wait to hear about the journal.

I am sure you will be great with teaching and making time for everything! Hugs!

Kristin said...

You are stuck with me write or don't write, I'll find you...LOL!

MrsSpock said...

I could have written this post myself. Every time I post one of the once-a week post on my blog, I resist the urge to apologize for being a terrible commenter. I read as much as I can, but living life is taking a front seat. We worked so hard to have our families, though, it seems wrong to apologize for making them number one.

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