THE MISSION

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This is a place for anyone who has felt the loss of a child. Treat this as a communication haven regardless of how or when you felt your loss. My definition of loss: miscarriage at any stage, still birth regardless of week gestation, infant death at any month, and loss of a child even if your child was all grown up. For me they all hold the same root of devestation. None are more profound or more "easily" dealt with than another.

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Friday, August 7, 2009

Shifting

I awoke this morning to find my husband's lips on my cheek. As if in a commercial, the smell of strong coffee wafted through the room. "Bear's had breakfast and Comedian's still sleeping" he said, "I have to go. Love you - hope today is better."

After listening to the sound of his engine dissapear I lingered for a few minutes more. I opened my eyes. Yes, something is a bit brighter today. I realized with minor shock.

I walked downstairs to find Bear calm, happy, surrounded by her barbies and spinning a 'lets pretend' story in song. perfect

My coffee waited for me, just a bit of milk, no sugar. perfect

A few responses from yesterday's show and tells waited for me with love and support and countless hugs. thank you

An idea hits me: perhaps I'll do a load of laundry today, or pay some bills, or finally go shopping in my closet to find a dress for that wedding we are going to tommorrow.

I do so love weddings. They are love and hope and promise all spun into one beautiful day, finished by good food, good drink, and a spin or two around the dance floor.

Could it be, be purging my emotion I've been granted a brief haitus from this grief? I try on my old meditation mantra.

I will embrace this day, I will create this day, I will enjoy this day for what it is.

I'll let you know -- but so far so good. Have to go put the girls eggs on a plate. Yes, I actually cooked eggs. See? Good signs.

7 comments:

Once A Mother said...

so happy to hear that you have been granted a 'hiatus' from the pain. these are sometimes the kindest of gifts, and should be embraced. peace

Sara said...

Enjoy this break, enjoy the wedding. Sending vibes from my mantra—heart, heal, hope—to you.

Kristin said...

Very good signs. I'm glad you've been granted a reprieve from your grief. Enjoy today and the wedding tomorrow.

Bluebird said...

I love your mantra. And your perfect start to the day. :)

Enjoy today. And tomorrow.

Lavender Luz said...

Awww, Sweetie. I'm so sorry you've been having a rough time.

Abiding with you during the coming weeks as you remember Emma. As we ALL remember Emma.

Michelle said...

So happy that things feel better. I hope it continues. Enjoy the break you deserve it!

MrsSpock said...

I've found myself using my old meditation mantra these past few weeks- and I like yours. Hope the peace is remaining...

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